swirl...

My thoughts are but a large swirl within my conscience...

So much to think about, so much to plan, so much to paint, so much to prepare for, so much to schedule, so much to do.

I am, surprisingly, quite happy with the swirls going on. I'm such a weird person (I'm sure you've figured that out already). I get overwhelmed quickly, but I also get bored quickly. I believe I'm standing right in that sweet spot... I have enough being thrown at me to create a really interesting (if not fear-inducing) challenge (aka "selling our house while living in it with three young kids and working three jobs and cooking and cleaning and and and...), but so far it hasn't overcome me. Sure, I've had my panicky moments, but for the most part I've become a commander of sorts, and I'm enjoying the role (yes, I love being bossy ... oldest of 6...). Paint this! Carpet that! Throw this out! Give this away!... Zach and I are running around like maniacs, but we're hoping the stress and activity causes us to lose a few of those "holiday" pounds (here's hoping). Anyway, I'm actually enjoying this, because it means we're moving our family forward. It's hard to watch your husband do a job for so long that he hasn't really liked much. Seeing him move toward his passion, his dream... and knowing that I, as his partner, have helped him to get there? It's a really good feeling. He's happier and more joyful about the future. I've had the privilege of waking up every day and LOVING my career choice (social work) AND staying home to raise my kids. Now he gets to experience that joy too. This is what life is all about... I love it.

I'm also taking this well because others are helping me take this well. Meaning, our friends and family. Our friends, especially our "people" the Duncans, are walking us through this. They truly are our people. They won't let us fall, and they are here for us every step of the way. We are so incredibly blessed by their friendship (definitely more of a family status now). I need to get some good pictures of them... You should know them. They are so very dear to us. And our families have been incredible too. Offering up attic space to store our extra stuff, helping us with cars, telling us we can actually live with them (thanks mom and dad) if our house sells (please dear lord jesus) before we move this summer. Deep love for us. None of our family members will let us fail, either. Our siblings are being so sweet and checking in on our progress all the time. Zach's sister is even going to let our dog live with her when our house goes on the market. These people, our people... are rare. Life is no cake walk, and none of us is perfect, and we all have our problems... but still. We are so lucky.

I'm rambling on because I want to remember this. This support. From all of you, too. Our cheerleaders. Your prayers and good thoughts? We feel them in this season of our lives. You are buoying us up.

2011... already one for the history books.

Happy New Year!

(ps- here's a pic of our dog, Zoe. She's very neglected on this blog, but she's beautiful and smart and sweet. the problem involves her hairiness. HAIR. everywhere. all the time. no matter what we do. we'll miss her for awhile...)